Acceptance: Redefining the definition

I just read an incredible essay written by a parent of a child with special needs on acceptance. I have posted some excerpts from the essay. I encourage all parents regardless of the diagnosis to read and contemplate. Please click  here for the entire essay.

-Acceptance is when a person agrees to experience a situation, to follow a process or condition (often a negative or uncomfortable situation) without attempting to change it, protest, or exit. 

Implied is a willingness, a belief and an understanding of the reception. Also implied is the condition of not attempting to change, protest or exit. Given that definition and the totallity of the word, how can we accept without attempting to change or protest? We can’t ….but we can create our own definition of “acceptance” one in its truest form.

-Acceptance takes time. Accepting a diagnosis is one thing, accepting the life the diagnosis will bring is something completely different and much more important. When I speak of acceptance I am speaking of accepting the full magnitude of the situation. The acceptance that there are some things you will be able to do to make changes, improvements, triumphs and gains and there will be others, that for no lack of effort, will remain.

-The acceptance that your purpose in life has changed.   Accepting life as you knew it has changed.  Your day to day routine has changed.  Your marriage has changed.  Your parenting style has changed.  The life your other children will lead has changed.  Your comfort zone has changed. Your world has changed.  Accepting the diagnosis is the easy part, its accepting the life unexpected that truly takes time and work.

-Accept what you cant change and change what you can’t accept. Trying to change the unchangeable is not the solution, in fact, it is the problem. Being happy doesn’t mean everything is perfect (or the masses perception of perfect) it means you have made a conscious decision to look past the imperfections and difficult adjustments in your life, accept them and live with strength and calm with your life unexpected. That to me is happiness. 

Know that with every gain will come immeasurable rewards. With the negatives will come the positives and you will have a greater understanding of love, patience and compassion than most could ever dream of.

*With acceptance will come the peace that all special needs parents need to continue on this incredible journey.

Article: Subtle signs of ADHD

In the past decade, the number of children diagnosed with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) rose 24 percent, according to a study published in JAMA Pediatrics, the pediatric journal of the American Medical Association. The disorder is both over- and under-diagnosed. Because the symptoms overlap, ADHD can often be mistaken for other disorders such as anxiety, depression and oppositional defiant disorder. Untreated ADHD can hinder a child’s ability to learn and perform well in school, make friends and interact with family, and develop age-appropriate decision-making skills. A mistaken ADHD diagnosis may result in unnecessary treatment, medication and a great deal of stress for the child and parents. Accurate and early diagnosis is key to successfully treating ADHD, experts say. Progress toward a diagnosis usually begins with parental concerns over a child’s behavior or problems in school. Symptoms of ADHD can include: * Difficulty paying attention * Frequent daydreaming at inappropriate times * Easily distracted from schoolwork or play * Forgetfulness * Inability to sit still * Excessive fidgeting * Talking too much or speaking without thinking * Inability to play quietly * Difficulty learning to take turns. “While ADHD can’t be cured, it can be successfully managed,” the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention states on its website. Early diagnosis and effective treatment of ADHD can help people with the disorder lead successful lives.
(article excerpt from http://specialedpost.com/2013/03/14/the-subtle-signs-of-add/)

Why hire an Educational Consultant?

"In times of crisis, parents are often overwhelmed by a barrage of emotions. The confusion and desperation associated with having a troubled teenager or child can be extremely trying. Parents may not be aware of the options available, or may not be able to decide on their own which alternative best meets their situation and the needs of their child. Among the questions consultants often hear: How do we know when treatment is necessary? What would be best for our child? Is an intervention needed? Should we find a residential program? Would a wilderness therapy program be a good choice, or would an emotional growth boarding school be better? An IECA educational consultant can help families find the answers they need. " Excerpt taken from http://www.iecaonline.com/atrisk.html

Site Visits: North Carolina

Tomorrow I am heading to North Carolina to visit 4 programs; Talisman, Four Circles, Stone Mountain, and SUWS. Looking forward to visiting all of the programs. Stay tuned for my visit report.

The relationship between ECs and other professionals

Here is a link to an article from IECA describing the partnership of an Independent Educational Consultant and Learning professionals.

http://www.iecaonline.com/PDF/IECA_LD-and-Consultants.pdf